An Overdue Update!

I've been staring at this blank screen for several minutes now and have no idea where to start... I think I'll issue a small warning here, this will probably be slightly depressing. God is good, life is good, but that doesn't mean life has been all sunshine and rainbows.

So I'm going to start in the middle of 2012. Looking back, I should have realized that I couldn't stay on the top of the world forever. At the time, our boy was just about to turn 1 and doing wonderful (still is!). We had just gotten back from a family vacation to Charleston with my parents and sister (and my aunt & uncle joined us for a bit!). We had finally found a new church home. Things were great. And then 3 weeks before Jack turned one, someone very close to us was diagnosed with cancer. Time seemed to drag during treatments, but things are looking up now. We now have a Survivor in the family. :)

In the middle of chemo treatments (early November), Josh and I found out we were pregnant.  And hilariously, we were due July 15 (Jack's birthday). It seemed perfect. Some brightness in an otherwise crappy time. And then I miscarried during the week of Thanksgiving. For those who don't know, or don't remember, this was my second miscarriage, as I had one before Jackson. Statistically, you have a 20% chance of having a miscarriage with no known problems. So the fact I had two is not really rare, just unlucky. So I tried to stay positive and wait out the recommended amount of cycles before we started trying again.

Chemo ended a few weeks before Christmas, and radiation started New Years Eve. During that time, Josh's job at Beaumont had taken a bad turn. He was miserable, which in turn made me miserable. For the last several years though, my parents, sister and I had been dreaming and talking of moving to Charleston, SC. We all love the area, and since we all hate the cold and snow, it was a perfect dream. Our biggest hold up was Josh, because the man doesn't hate the cold and snow the way we do.. And he absolutely hates humidity and heat. That was part of our plan when we vacationed there earlier in the year... To see how well Josh would handle it and if he would be interested in the move. And he loved it! We were thrilled! So back to him being miserable ... We all knew that it would be hardest for Josh to find a job in that area. Katie being a teacher means she really could go anywhere once she's ready.. And Mom and Dad were planning it when they retired. So we discussed moving now, just because there were plenty of jobs available down in North Carolina and we figured, we may as well start sooner than later trying to get there. Plus, who knew how long the jobs would be available, and we didn't want to be stuck in Michigan with everyone else down south. If he never found anything in SC, then at least we'd be closer in NC then MI.

Josh started applying for jobs on New Years Day and started interviewing that very next week. Everything went much quicker than I had anticipated, but we soon realized we were doing the right thing ... Because this company he's working for right now, when the CEO called Josh to interview him, said that he needed someone in Salisbury for a couple years until he got the business going in Charleston... !! We were so excited! So now, (it may be a few years longer than we anticipated) we know we'll eventually end up in the same place as everyone else. :) Things were finally looking up again, for the entire family (although, admittedly, they're still upset that we're so far away, but knowing this will bring us closer in the end is worth it!). 2013 was definitely going to be our year!

Radiation was scheduled to end on Valentine's Day. So we all had a special day planned, though not together. Since the last 8 or 9 months had been so hard, Josh and I decided to have Katie babysit (and who would she rather spend Valentine's Day with??? She'll tell you Jack!) and enjoy an evening out. I had been sick for the previous month before this, and was excited to finally be able to relax and have a nice glass of wine (I was on all kinds of medication, and one that I was told if I drink at all on it, I'd be violently sick). So looking at the calendar, I realized I should probably just take a pregnancy test to make sure I could have a glass of wine. And the test came back positive. I was absolutely in shock. Statistically, it should not have happened. The chanced has been so tiny.. So naturally I felt good about this pregnancy. We were going to have a little Halloween baby!

Due to my previous losses, we were monitoring this pregnancy closer. I got the first couple blood draws, and they were fantastic numbers! Then we got an ultrasound. We found a sac, but no baby. But it was still a little early, and quite possibly were just a little off on our dates. Went a week and a half later for another ultrasound and found a heartbeat! This put us almost into the middle of March, only days before Josh and I flew down to Salisbury to look for housing. We spent the weekend down here, then on Sunday I flew back to Detroit and Josh flew to Oaklahoma City for his training. I had another ultrasound that Monday. Everything came shattering back down when we found out we there was no heartbeat. I'm not sure I would have been able to handle it if my mom hadn't been there with me. It was an absolutely horrible week, and I got to throw in a funeral for a boy I grew up with in the middle of it, all with my husband being half way across the country. Since we were moving in two weeks, I was given one week for my body to naturally take care of the miscarriage, and thankfully, it did only a couple days later. Again, I was lucky my mom and sister happened to be over at the time, because I'm not sure how I would have handled it one my own.

I ended up having my check up on the day we moved. Talk about stress... Since it was miscarriage #3, I ended up getting blood work done, looking for any blood diseases. That wait is one of those conflicting waits.. Where you don't want anything to come back positive, but at the same time you do so you can understand why this has been happening to you. Well, one of the tests came back positive. I won't bore you with all details, but it turns out I have a blood clotting disorder where my blood clots too well... Which could mean that when the umblical cord is forming, because the vessels are so small, that my blood could be clotting and cutting off circulation to the cord. So now I'm taking 5 different daily meds/vitamins. It's exhausting, honestly.. But I know it'll be worth it in the end.

On top of that, Josh has been working in Savannah, Georgia every week since we moved here. So Sunday through Thursday I get to experience what it would be like to be a single mom.. And I have the utmost respect for the women who do it.. It's an incredibly hard job. Thankfully, it looks like he'll be working in NC by the end of the month. We'll be looking forward to that. :)

Now we've got so much to look forward to... The cancer is gone! In just 5 weeks our little boy turns 2... I know I'm not supposed to say this yet, but I feel old! I'm looking forward to enjoying a summer with my boys. We've got so much to explore down here.. We have a wedding to celebrate in October (that had I kept the baby we wouldn't have been able to go to).. We will be planning a vacation to Kentucky in March to celebrate some 30th birthdays.. And hopefully, somewhere down the line, a successful pregnancy.

I think that's where I'm going to leave things today. I need to get moving. I've got some Mary Kay product to mail out and grocery shopping to do before nap time. I will try to keep this a little more updated in the future. :)