Writing is fun!

I've decided that I want to continue to write in this, so I'm back. When I first created this blog, I thought that it would end up just being a pregnancy blog. I figured it would be nice for the family and friends that we don't get to talk to as often as we'd like so they could stay updated with things. I've since decided that just because we had a miscarriage doesn't mean I have to stop writing. So here I am!

Josh and I ended up having a kind of rough summer. While I had accepted the miscarriage, it still took a while to feel normal again. But I think we did as well as we could with it and still tried to enjoy our summer.

Unfortunately, I think Josh had a harder time than I did. Turns out, moving to U-M Hospital wasn't as great as he thought it would be. He was originally told he'd only have to train for 6-8 weeks, working the morning shift (6am-2:30pm, which means he leaves the house at 5am).. He started May 24th and he's still in training so he dealt with this all summer. And for those who don't know Josh, he definitely isn't a morning person. Thankfully, he was able to get back to Beaumont. He'll be starting back there next Monday. Then we're also hoping that within the next few months he'll find some sort of IT job. He's also planning on taking some sort of computer exam that would give him a special computer certification (don't ask me what kind, everything computer wise just blurs in my head - my brain isn't meant to process that kind of stuff). So hopefully, something will work out for him.

My job has been going okay. I don't mind the work, but I was working my 40 hours at 12 1/2 and Schoenherr. It was great since I lived so close. But at the start of September I got my hours cut (I'm down to three 10-hour days instead of four) and they moved me out to the clinic at 23 and Romeo Plank. It's a really nice clinic, but I do hate driving 30+ minutes to and from work.

While things haven't been wonderful, I do enjoy having my Tuesdays and Thursdays off. And I'm quite thankful that Josh will be back to Beaumont soon. With my hours cut, the gas prices were starting to hurt.

We did get a chance to go up to the U.P. and visit Rob and Emily over the forth of July. I think it was exactly what Josh and I needed. We needed that vacation and we had great time up there. We really wish we could be closer to them, but I have no desire to move any further north than I already am. If I move at all, I'm going south. :)

We also got to go camping twice this year. We went once in August with Leah and Nick. We didn't go too far, just one of the state parks in Holly. That was a lot of fun, even though I was sick the whole weekend. We didn't get to do as much hiking as we would have liked to, but we got to play in the little lake they had and got to relax. It really was fantastic. Our second trip was just recently, at the end of September, with my parents. We went out to the Battle Creek area to another state park. We really enjoyed this park and we definitely want to go back there. They had some fantastic trails to hike. We went wine tasting while we were out in that area. That was so much fun! I swear, we bought enough wine (and strangely enough, a bottle of vodka made from grapes) to last us a year! So we had a great time on that trip also.

Josh and I also celebrated our 3rd anniversary this past August. We didn't do anything special for it, but it is amazing at how fast the time has gone. It always surprises me when someone asks how long I've been married for.. I always have to think about it, like, has it really been that long? I feel like it was just yesterday. Then again, I look at how far we've come and I think "its got to be longer than that!".

I think this is where I'll end for now. I hope this find everyone well.

Until next time, adios.

On Hold...

So, I figure no one will see these two posts for another couple of months. We lost the baby yesterday. By my calculations, I was about 5 weeks and 2 days. And we're actually doing really well. The shock and disappointment was really hard at first, and plenty of tears were shed, but I feel that we got a lot out of the experience. My biggest fear was always that I wouldn't be able to conceive naturally, so the fact that it happened without us really trying is a huge win in my book. There's plenty of time for it to happen again and we are both looking forward to the next time.

I obviously won't be writing in here until the next time comes around, and I won't be telling anyone about this until we get a baby that sticks, but I felt I needed to kind of sign off on my first post, and it didn't seem fair to delete it. The whole first experience of being pregnant was exciting and the fact that we lost it shouldn't ruin that feeling.

So until then, we'll be on hold. :)

The Beginning

I'm not much of a phone talker so when we found out that we were pregnant, I figured writing everything down would be a good way to share all of our experiences. So, here we go.

I took my first HPT (home pregnancy test) on Saturday, May 29th, 2010. It was one of those free, cheap dip sticks you can get off websites. Even though there was some evidence that I was pregnant (such as my temperature rising that morning instead of dropping like it normally does), when those two lines showed up on the test I really didn't believe it. So I figured I'd show it to the color-blind guy just to make sure I wasn't seeing things. Then I still didn't believe it after Josh said he could see the two lines. I figured it had to be a mistake. Poor Josh, then next two days I was on a see-saw. "I'm pregnant!" "There's no way, I'm not pregnant." I finally decided on Monday, May 31st, 2010, that I'd take another HPT. At this point, I didn't really need the test since I had continued taking my temperatures, but you just don't get the same feeling by looking at a chart that you do by peeing on a stick. I took a digital test and sure enough, it said pregnant. We were both so excited! Some of the first words out of my mouth were "OMG we're pregnant! ... How do you celebrate without wine???" (Josh's answer was cake.)

Monday turned out to be a very difficult day, for both of us, I think. While we were both ecstatic about being pregnant, it was Memorial Day and we had a family gathering to go to. I had only accepted the fact that we were pregnant for about four hours before we had to go to the party, and four hours is not enough time to decide when we should tell everyone our news! (I say that I had only accepted it for four hours because I found out later that Josh believed the first positive pregnancy test on Saturday, so he was just waiting for me to get on board.) We decided to not tell anyone yet until we had more time to think about it, but I was ready to burst, I wanted to tell someone so bad!

So, that night we decided we'd tell just our immediate families. We went over to my parents first, gave them the big news. And after a little bit of confusion on Tuesday, we ended up at Josh's parents house to tell them. (Don't worry, we had also called Nick that afternoon!) I think I can confidently say that everyone is incredibly excited. :)

As of now, I haven't made any doctors appointments yet. Since Josh and I just changed jobs (Josh is at U-M Hospital in Ann Arbor and I'm at Complete Rehabilitation in Warren), we hadn't made any decisions about our health insurance before getting pregnant. So we made that decision on Monday and now we're waiting for everything to go through. And as luck would have it, my current OB has decided not to deliver anymore. So I'm just taking my time researching doctors in the area and trying to figure out who to go with.

So far I'm feeling good about everything. I really expected to freak out when this happened, and so far I'm feeling pretty balanced. I don't really have many symptoms yet, which I consider to be a good thing. Every now and then I get a little nauseous, but haven't been throwing up. I have been fairly tired, but it doesn't bother me too much if I can't lay down at all. I just end up yawning all day if I can't get a nap in.

And of course, the thing that I'm sure most will want to know, according to my own calculations, my due date is around February 8th, 2011. It may change when I finally go to the doctor, but for right now, I'll believe that I'm just barely over 4 weeks pregnant. :)

Thanks for reading - I'll try to update soon.

Love to all,
Nicole & Josh